Friday, September 23, 2011

Why I Pulled My Son From Sex Ed Class

Let me begin by saying I am fully in support of the public school education system for our family at this point in our life for many reasons. One of the main reasons is that I want my children to interact with those who do not know Jesus. I think it tests their faith, to see if it is theirs or just mom and dad's faith. I can quote just as many verses to you as you will to me on this topic of public education. My point in this post is not to argue what is the right or wrong way to educate your children. It is ultimately my view that each family needs to make the decision for each of their children on this issue. And we have fallen on the side of public schools at this time. We have always had our children at public school and when we moved to Ohio, they entered the Cardinal School District. Now that we are moving to a house, they have been placed in the Berkshire School District. We have found the teachers extremely nice and helpful and the kids are enjoying their time at the school.

The other day, we received a note from the school that the 6th graders were going to take part in the puberty education. My post title might be a bit misleading, for it is not really called "sex ed" anymore, but now it has to do with maturation (although, you probably clicked on this link because of the title of the post). Anyways, we contacted the school to find out what exactly was going to happen. They sent us a link to the video that was going to be shown in their class. We are thankful that we have the opportunity to interact with the school district, but after watching the video, we are pulling our son from this class. If you want to take the time, here is the video they will be watching in class:

It is usually a situation like this that makes the non-public school contingent of Christianity rise up against the public school. I am not rising up against them, but after giving it some thoughtful discussion with my wife, here are the reasons why I have pulled him from this class. 

1.  Boys & Girls Will Be In The Same Room
I see absolutely no reason why they need to have boys and girls in the same class to talk about this. The video talks about a girl getting her first period while she is at a sleep over with her friends. Her friends mom shows her what to do. She even shows her how to put a pad on her underwear and what to do with it after. I am 37 years old and I don't want to know this information. Certainly my 11-year old son does not need to know how a girl is to put a pad on her underwear in order to respect her, does he?

We were told that the reason for having the boys and girls in the same room is so that they can develop mutual respect for one another. Really? How does my son sitting next to Sally as they watch what happens to each others body help develop mutual respect for each other? If it were just the boys in one room watching a video on what happens to the male body, I would probably let him sit in and watch it. I have already talked to him about all of the things concerning the boys body becoming a man. But because they are combined, he will not be in there.

2.  It Contains Animated Pictures
Once again, does my son really need to see even animated pictures of a girl growing to become a woman? Does he need to sit next to a girl as she watches what happens when a boy gets an erection? Really? My guess it that for many of you, even my writing that is too much. This just brings about too much curiosity that I don't want my son to have. I don't want him to have any thoughts or images, even animated, about the body of a woman. No wonder pornography is such a problem in our world. We are arousing the curiosity of young minds as to what is behind clothing.

3. It Is The Parent's Responsibility
Unfortunately, the school has to do this sort of thing because the parents don't! My wife was curious and so when she was talking to the principal, she asked how many parents have asked about information on this class. One other parent. Yes, one other parent had contacted this principle to talk about this class. There might be many reasons why this is the case. Many parents just don't care about the sexual mind of their child. Many of them don't think about it and will have to respond instead of being proactive. And maybe many of them are embarrassed.

If your child is in the 6th grade (or higher) and you have not had multiple conversations with them about these things, shame on you. Christian parent, it is about time to stop treating sex as if it is some secret sinful thing. As I talked to my son about why I was pulling him out, I expressed to him that sex is a beautiful thing between a husband and wife. It is created by God to be a beautiful expression of intimacy. We need to stop treating it as shameful.

Let me end with some thoughts by Steve Farrar in his book, Point Man. He says,
"You cannot afford not to educate your children about sex. Yet the majority fail just here: 'Sex education is ignored by most parents, both Christian and non-Christian, out of discomfort, ignorance, or indifference. According to most surveys, most adolescents report they have never been given any advice about sex by either parent.' . . . A man is responsible to teach his children about sex. As a rule of thumb, fathers should teach their sons and mothers should teach their daughters. But the father, as head of the family, has a responsibility to make sure that each child is given the proper and correct instruction by the appropriate parent at the right time." (205)
He goes on to say that the policy of parental sex education is: "Get to your kids before their peers do" (210). You can take this blog post one of two ways. Either you can see how bad the public school system is or you can see the importance of your involvement in your child's life in the conversation of sex.


  1. Excellent article Thad!! I totally agree with you. David and I had to deal with this issue with Daniel last year. Our situation was different because the video was more conservative and they seperated the boys from the girls so we let him stay and watch. David had "the talk" with Daniel before this so he had a christian persepective on sex and already knew about it. I'm really shocked they had the boys and girls watching together. That is just weird and uncomfortable to me. I would feel uncomfortable at my age watching a video like that with other men in the room. Yucky!!

  2. I would totally have had him stay in if it were separated and he was just watching the boy part of it....I didn't like watching it with my wife. :)


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.